Alexa Hope

Here's a bit of a longer story about how we found out about Alexa Hope being a girl:) We were scheduled to have our gender reveal party and were anxiously awaiting the news of whether our baby was a boy or girl. The morning of the intended sonogram I got a phone call from our dr.'s office announcing that the sonogram machine had in fact broken. . . Those who know me know that this was a panic moment for me as my desire to schedule nearly everything( a task that God is so graciously working with me on and slowly remedying) set in and I frantically called the other location for a sonogram hoping and praying they could get us in that day.

Sure enough they had an opening and we were able to go in that same day at 2pm with our gender reveal party set for that night at 6pm. The sonographer got started and told me,"I know what this baby is do you want me to tell you." I was at this point totally prepared to hear boy as I had with my two previous pregnancies and was totally fine with that and with being a boy mommy forever, while I was musing over that she says, "It's a girl." I was so shocked that I actually think I cried a bit which has never really happened because I had totally prepared myself for a boy. . . that's when God in His grace shocks me. :) I feel like this entire scene was once again evidence that God is a God of surprises! With no idea what to do next I walked around in a kind of pink daze for the remainder of the day. . .

Ok so still there. . . the tutu's, the bows, the pink ribbons and to be honest my fear. I don't know why I am so afraid to raise a girl, I am a girl. I guess over the years I just have become accustomed to raising  boys and it has become comfortable a place that God has rarely left me for long. In comfort is a lack of need and I am convinced that I desperately need God as a mother. I need God to tell me what to say, I need God to tell me how to raise them, how to love them, how to discipline them and how to raise a girl in a generation that will be telling her she's not enough. The echo of my voice in her life I am convinced and convicted will be, "You are enough." You are a princess but not one that is in a fairy tale that needs a man to rescue her, unless that man is Jesus Christ. You are a princess with a commission you have a purpose beyond the mirror and that purpose is to love God, to love others, and to share Jesus. So perhaps my fear is slowly being turned into a bigger saga of a love for a daughter that I have not yet met but anxiously await to meet. . .